WHY PORCUPINES EAT PORK BUT DON'T EAT PINE

(or what I really learned from reading Robert Frost in high school)

Stopping by woods on a snowy evening,
I contemplated a mighty powerful question--
Why do porcupines eat pork but don't eat pine?
Is it because of their religion or because
they prefer pork to pine?
To solve my dilemma I have consulted a
homosexual donkey that was passing nearby.
"Dear Mr. Jackass, can you help me?" I asked,
posing him my delicate question.
"Certainly," said our friend.
"The answer is very simple. Good pine trees
make good fences and good fences make good
neighbors. Personally, I prefer donkeys of
the same sex."

                                                July 3, 1986
                                           --Alexander Shaumyan